NEXT SHOW, MONDAY 4/3!

APRIL 3rd, 2006
"Tell Your Friends!"
at The Lolita Bar
266 Broome St., off of Allen St.
Take the F train to Delancey St.
8:00pm - FREE SHOW

WITH YOUR MC - Baron Vaughn

AND:
Victor Varnado
has been seen on Comedy Central's "Premium Blend" and ABC's "Jimmy Kimmel Live!" He has signed a deal to direct a movie starring Charlie Murphy.

Liam McEneaney
has been seen on Comedy Central's "Premium Blend," and VH1's "Best Week Ever," and a writer for "Standup Nation w/ Greg Giraldo"

a rare NYC appearance by
Bryan Tucker
who is a writer for "Saturday Night Live" who has also written for "Chappelle's Show," "The Chris Rock Show," and "MAD TV"

The Hazzards
have appeared on Comedy Central's "Out on the Edge" hosted by Alan Cumming, and on Comedy Central's "The World Stands Up." Their video "Gay Boyfriend" was an Internet sensation, getting over one million downloads in its first three months live on the InterWeb; it was later remixed as a EuroPop Dance tune, and reached the UK charts at #67, ahead of some crap song by Seal. They played at the Kennedy Center Honors for Steve Martin, and Anne from The Hazzards sang the national anthem before a Red Sox game.

AND OF COURSE, OUR HOUSE BAND - A Brief View of the Hudson, a folk-rock duo that blows away audiences at every show they play.

The Woebegotten Misanthrope

Dear Blog,

How many of The Hazzards can you spot in this video? It's the new, awesome video, Misanthrope! Directed by our true BFF Casimir Nozkowski. Seth is awesome! Cas is awesome! I got this song is stuck in my head again, just thinking about it. Dang!

Love,
Sydney

Project Runway

Dear Blog,

It's true, I auditioned for Project Runway this weekend, and I didn't get in. I got up at 5 in the morning, stood out in the cold with my outfits and portfolios until my feet literally went numb, and made three very, very sweet girls change in a dirty Dunkin' Donuts bathroom.

I did a good job, though. I passed all the tests, got to the last audition room and was interviewed on camera. The guy who I made friends with in line (Bendik, who had a spiritual revelation that he should be on the show) came out of the interview room right before I went in, looking seriously beat down. He said they were going to be really mean.

Tim Gunn said that he didn't understand how my samples were all from the same designer. Huh?

I said, "I wanted to bring you guys some variety."

Mary Gelhar said, "That IS the problem with variety."

Daniel V said he didn't get how it was both pop and classic. They all said they couldn't figure me out, but they were intrigued.

The woman from Elle looked like she was going to throw up every time she asked me a question. I'm sure she totally hated me. Or thought I was disgusting. Maybe because I mentioned that I had made clothing out of garbage once. She said, "Why would you do that?" And then made her puke face.

Then Tim Gunn saw the page in my portfolio from NY Magazine and said, "I really wish you had brought that dress instead." What does that mean? Tim Gunn, you are an enigma.

They talked to me on camera for a relatively long time, but they didn't seem to actually like me. Or maybe they were just cranky. They didn't really care about my answers to their questions, and pretty much answered them themselves. They mostly just wanted to say something snappy on camera. I'd like to think I said some snappy things, too.

Then they wrote "maybe" on their papers and said they would call at the end of the day. They didn't call. Maybe I'll make it to a wacky audition montage. I totally don't want to be on a wacky audition montage.

Love,
Sydney

P.S. Sorry, there isn't really anything funny or hazzards-y about this story (unless you count the guy doing a serious #2 in the Dunkin' Donuts bathroom right before my models went in). I didn't even get a chance to mention The Hazzards in my interview. I just wanted to share.

P.P.S. My horoscope says I'm going to make an awsome new partnership on the 29th. Does that mean I can hold out hope that they'll call me until then?

DEAR DIARY: Rap attack!

Dear Diary,
We started a rap with Nikki Savino at lunch today. It's awesome. It's all about how we're the best and the things we like ("Palmettos, Jams, and hair!") and how tough we are ("But when it comes to school, hey - we don't care!"). We might perform it at girl scout camp but we don't know yet. Nikki is definitely one of the coolest girls in our grade. Man, do we wish we were Italian.
bye.
Anne & Sydney
The Hazzards
www.hazzards.com


Wednesday, March 15th
The Hazzards' Wednesday Night Make Out Party
Galapagos
70 North 6th Street
between Kent and Wythe
Williamsburg, Brooklyn
10pm
Free!
with HARTLY GOLDSTEIN and an extra special acoustic set from BISHOP ALLEN ! Don't miss this incredibly awesome show. We'll be debuting our new song FRIDAY NIGHT TICKLE FIGHT! ...and we heard there might be vampires in the back room! Spooky! Sexy!

See you there!!

PS: Guess what?! You can get awesome Hazzards ringtones from Comedy Central. It's true!!